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Why does it always take a lifetime for the weekend to come, and then when it does, it’s gone in the blink of an eye? Seriously, someone needs to develop a mechanism to slow time so weekends last way longer than they do. This weekend came and went, but I was able to get a lot of nothing done. Just the way I like it! I was at my parent’s house because I wanted to see my relatives coming into town and hang with my brother. My brother is about to be a father so everyone was coming in for his girlfriend’s baby shower. Everything went well and I think all the attendees had a great time. Because of the “no boys allowed” policy, I took my dad and brother fishing.
Anyway, back to the post. The short weekend had a lot of down time which really got me thinking about life and such. This is a fairly new thing that has happened in the last few years. I think I am finally getting out of the stage of life where I really care what other’s thought of me and now I am focused on finding happiness with myself. So, I want to share some insight with the young grad students that I think will be helpful along your journey into a academic career.
No one cares
One of the things that kind of bothered me, but I came to terms with it was that no one cares. Well, let me rephrase that, no one cares as much as you do. You are going to put a great amount of effort into doing grad school, passing classes, losing 10 pounds from stress, stuff like that. People will not celebrate as much as you will when you accomplish things and it may hurt. They just haven’t put as much effort into it as you have and don’t know the struggles. Do not be upset if they don’t celebrate your small wins. They are currently going through their own battles. This is definitely something you will experience as a grad student.
People will tell you that you can’t do it. Don’t listen to them.
I know many people (other grad students), myself included, that get criticized for what they do. People, some very close to me, make fun of because I have a blog and spend a good amount of time trying to make it worth reading. People may not understand why you are doing something, and they may make fun of you or tell you that it isn’t worth doing. Don’t listen to them. If you are passionate about something, or just want something to do, go for it. Create a blog about spearfishing, though you’re afraid of water. Start a YouTube channel about art history, though you are an engineer. Do something that will bring some form of happiness and don’t let other’s discourage you. I see so many other grad students stopping their passions. Please don’t do this because someone didn’t understand it.
Some people will never understand
Some people will never understand why you study European history from 1867-1868. They will never understand why you love researching squirrels in Ethiopia (if there are any) or why you wrote a whole research paper on the solubility of lead in drinking water. Who the heck cares what they think! If you love what you do, that is all the really matters at the end of the day. Some people go their whole lives taking into consideration what other people think about what they do. That is not what living is about. Find what you love and do that.
Do what you Love
Whatever you love doing, keep doing it. There will always be people in your life that just won’t understand why you are doing things. Recently, I was caught off guard because an employer asked my why I was getting a PhD in engineering when it really wouldn’t make a difference. I was taken aback by this comments. What I really wanted to say was “the reason I am doing my PhD is to not get stuck in a position like the one you are offering”. I held my tongue. I love doing research and I love engineering. Why can’t I get a doctorate in engineering?
What I really am trying to say is do what you love and you will find your path. People may tell you that what you do is dumb, but one day, you might make millions because you are doing what you are passionate about. Also, who the *&^# cares what other people think? They are just jealous that you found something that truly makes you happy and they haven’t. So please, don’t care what they think.
I really like to blog. I love how there are a whole bunch of people, all over the world, that read what I write. Heck, some people even message me and tell me what to write about next or to tell me that they love my content. This is why I do this. I want to make a small contribution to the world. Do I care about the people telling me that “this is a phase” and “you need to focus on something else. Blogging get’s you nowhere”? No, I do not. I laugh, say thanks for your input and I continue on with my blogging. I hope you can just say “thank you” and continue your passions. It is how you will find happiness. I hope you all have an amazing day doing what you love. I know I will.
**If you or someone you know is suffering from mental health issues, I highly recommend that they seek help. Online–Therapy.com or TalkSpace.com are great ways to reach out to a licensed therapist and get the help needed. Therapy has 100% helped me and I know it can help you.