Grad school is a time where you may get very few wins. By this, I mean you may fail a ton of experiments. The paper you spent months on gets rejected. Your adviser might hate you (hopefully not). Stuff like this makes grad school extremely mentally taxing. I have said this before and I will say it again. You will be desensitized to the word “No” by the time you leave grad school. You will hear it and see it so many times that it won’t even phase you later on. You’ll be numb to rejection.
You may not win all of the time, but you will get victories. Honestly, getting a few wins feels so much better in grad school because of all of the rejection. When you get those small victories, Treat Yo-Self!
Small wins are a great way to boost your self esteem. If you get a good grade, treat yourself to something fun. You don’t have to go crazy and buy a car or something. Maybe go see a movie or get ice cream. Do something to really solidify that win. You don’t get too many in grad school :(.
For things such as passing your quals, or getting a paper published, I suggest treating yourself to time off. Guilt free time off that is! These are huge milestones in your academic career and deserve some time away from work. One thing that I did when I passed my qualifying exam was go to Disney. Something big like this really makes you feel like you did a great thing, well, because you did do a great thing.
One thing that I have notice though, and this is from not just me but others, is that when you do something successfully or accomplish something, it is almost anticlimactic. When I passed my qualifying exam, there was no overwhelming sense of accomplishment. I didn’t feel a wave of excitement come over me like I imagined. It was very, blah. Like, cool I passed, but nothing more. This is how others have felt too. That is why you need to celebrate so you can get that feeling of excitement that might not come from just accomplishing the goal.
Just Treat Yourself
Whatever you do, celebrate it. You are working on stuff that is very hard and you are succeeding in it whether you think you are or not. Celebrate the small victories and it will make this time in your life so much more enjoyable. Grad school is what you make it, so choose to make it exciting and fun.
I hope you guys have a wonderful Friday. I am celebrating surviving another week without going insane by having a nice cup of coffee.
**If you or someone you know is suffering from mental health issues, I highly recommend that they seek help. Online-Therapy.com or TalkSpace.com are great ways to reach out to a licensed therapist and get the help needed. Therapy has 100% helped me and I know it can help you.